White Lightening May Strike Twice

It never ceases to amaze me. They put anything (and everything) on tv and we will watch it.

We will watch people eat couch stuffing on a show about weird obsessions. We will watch people who weigh so much they have to live on a bed. I still have nightmares about the 1000 pound man.

I admit it – I also spend time watching Moonshiners, a show about people illegally making and selling … you guessed it – moonshine. Well, I have to get blog material somehow…

Let me say that again – it’s a show about people who illegally make and sell moonshine. And we watch it. Maybe the rest of us live vicariously through people daring enough to do something like that. A production team follows these people into the back woods in Tennessee, Kentucky, Virginia and Louisiana to film their victories when they make a good batch of moonshine and the failures when one of the stills explodes or somebody takes the shine and runs.

I have a few questions about this whole thing. First of all, how did they find the people to be on the show? Did they put an ad in the paper for any moonshiners who might want to come out of hiding and advertise that they make moonshine? If I made illegal moonshine, I don’t think being on tv would be high on my agenda. How do they not get arrested? The doublewide husband has tried to explain it and I still don’t fully understand.

They’re constantly watching their rearview mirrors for signs of revenuers tailing them. It’s definitely not a boring line of work.

Most of the moonshiners use the buddy system. One of them mixes up the moonshine and the other one does the heavy lifting and the bootlegging. I guess there’s an art to making moonshine and following your recipe to the last detail. I don’t think Betty Crocker knows about this. Part of it evidently involves wearing overalls with no shirt. If I ever decide to try moonshine, I’d rather have some made by a guy wearing a shirt.

Not all of the moonshiners are men, though. There are a couple of women involved in making the white lightening. One makes shine with her dad — what a way to bond.  The family that makes shine together stays together, I guess. The same goes for the married couple they somehow talked into being part of the series.

They’re innovative too, the moonshiners. They come up with all kinds of different flavors to put in their cauldrons. I’m sure apples and strawberries mixed in the mash somehow makes it kind of healthy.

Now some of the moonshiners are going legal — their names and pictured are plastered all around the distilleries that have cropped up all over tourist joints like Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge. Another success story. Entrepreneurship is on the move.

I don’t know if all the other moonshiners will go legal. Maybe they’re  having too much fun running from the law. That doesn’t seem like a very good way to live, but each to his own.

I think I’ll stick to writing blogs. As far as I know, that’s still legal.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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You Gotta Laugh

In one of the Andy Griffith episodes, Andy and Opie are talking about Opie’s friend, Johnny Paul Jason’s “lergics” and how he wasn’t allowed to breathe between April and May. Andy says, “He has to breath to live.” It’s the same with laughing.

You gotta laugh.

Find something to laugh about every day – several times a day. The Bible says “a merry heart does good like a medicine”. So skip the pills and laugh. (I’m not a doctor, so don’t not take your medicine just because I said so)

If God says laughing is important, then it’s IMPORTANT. That’s the main reason I started this blog (not just this one you’re reading right now — the whole idea). While everybody else is doling out info about other important things in life like mental health, finances, Biblical wisdom and all, I’m over here just trying to help people laugh more (and dole out a little wisdom in the process).

Maybe you’ve forgotten how to laugh — life with its ups and downs has stolen your giggle box. It’s not hard to track down and recover. Don’t leave it sitting on some evidence room shelf — take back your laugh.

Nothing makes you feel any better than a good, hearty laugh. I find the “funny” in just about everything. If you see me laughing and there’s no one else around, don’t call the guys in the white coats, I’ve probably heard or read something that struck me as hilarious. Laughing is ok.

Yeah, old tv, like the Andy Griffith Show, is the way to go if you want a good laugh. That was some of the best writing ever and those shows were hilarious. The characters were funny just being themselves. I dare you to watch one episode of the “Fun Girls” or one with Goober and Gomer and not laugh. And Barney – Don Knotts could make you hee haw just singing good old 14A.

The world needs to laugh more. Heck, our own country needs to learn to laugh more. So, I”m fulfilling my mission right here, every week (well, most weeks). If you need help finding your way to Laughville USA, tune in regularly and I’ll see what I can to help point you in the right direction.

 

 

Doughnuts Cause Crime

If I ever go bad and swich over to the dark side of life… the doughnuts did it. In the kitchen — with a spatula.

I know I said once that boots could do it, but I need to add in doughnuts. Both of those things.

While driving home the other day I passed a Krispy Kreme store and there sat a bunch of KK trucks with pictures of big, lovely doughnuts displayed on the side. It was almost more than I could stand. I wondered, for a minute, if I could get in one of those trucks and drive off without being detected. First I would have to steal doughnuts to fill the back of it. I might get caught, but I would be happy.

How bad can doughnut jail be?

My aim is to not knowingly commit crimes – I want to be a good, law abiding citizen. But there’s them dang doughnuts.

I seriously think all the doughnut stores should let me be their spokesperson and pay me in doughnuts. That’s me — the perfect doughnut representative. I’m real and believable. I couldn’t advertise pickles or shrimp, but I could so talk about those sweet, lovely confections that make even the strongest dieter jelly-legged.

I feel a poem coming on, a soliloquy, if you will: an ode to those light, fluffy puffs of heaven on earth in the form of dough and sugar. Oh my….

I may have to go into business for myself and open up a corner doughnut cafe. The big question : what should my cafe sign say — is it doughnut or donut??

My Life in Food

I don’t know if it’s a “Southern Thang” or not, but my life has been one big foodfest.

I think back on the years leading up to now and I see a lot of food. Food in my family has always been connected with fun events. Well, except maybe funerals. Then again, we always manage to laugh and eat our way through the sad times, too.

My memories are flooded with church dinners, family holiday get-togethers, Uncle Dempsey’s butternut cakes, Aunt Bobbie’s mashed potatoes (the absolute best), family picnics and Pal’s hamburgers. When I get to heaven, I want a big bowl of those mashed potatoes waiting on me. (I don’t want them now — just save me some for later)

It seems like we were always eating or planning what to eat next.

Pal’s was a little hotdog and hamburger joint in the town where I grew up and it was about the only restaurant my mom would go to. Back in the day, they gave kids a hamburger for every “A” at report card time.  I don’t know if schools even give report cards now, but that’s another subject. I walked past there on my way home from school every day, and one particular report card time I got a whole bag of hamburgers. You can imagine who the big hero was that day as I carried my loot in and gave it to my mom. We had a hamburger supper that night. I’m sure we had a big ol pan of fried potatoes to go with them. (Pal’s has since grown into a chain of stores across the area, but I don’t think they give out free hamburgers any more)

Pizza came to town at a little bakery located on the other side of the highway from where I walked home. I remember the sign that announced their new offering and not knowing what the heck “pizza” was. (I had a time learning to pronounce the word) If it didn’t come from a garden or the Pal’s window, we didn’t eat it. Eventually we tried the new concoction and we liked it. Our friends, the Adinolfi’s, introduced us to authentic Italian food and the rest of that story is history too.

Young people today are missing out on so much — what are they gonna blog about when they get older?

I’m glad that I have all the memories to laugh about now. I’m not even concerned about telling my age through talking about all the “firsts” we experienced, from color tv to private line phones. I hope everybody’s memories are as fun as mine are. Every day wasn’t a walk on the funny farm, but I think the good far outweighed the bad.

It’s a good thing I married into a family that likes to eat as much as I do. Now, when’s the next get together?

I could sure go for a Pal’s hotdog right now.

No Resolutions Here – Well, Maybe

I don’t usually make new year’s resolutions. I quit making them years ago and haven’t really missed it. That’s probably why I’m a week late with this.

I don’t diet, so I can’t resolve to lose weight. I exercise some, but I don’t like the gym. I work out using my own little exercise reward program — I get a reward and then determine how much I need to walk to kind of even it all out. It’s my plan. It works.

I realize that I could be more supportive of those who make resolutions, so here’s my list of things I’ll think about resolving to do:

  • eat healthier — it’s easier for me to work in a little healthy here and there instead of trying to do too much at one time, so here goes — I’ll eat more apples and brussels sprouts. I love both of those, so it should be easy for me to keep this one. I prefer my apples cooked with butter and cinnamon. And hey, cinnamon is really healthy! So there – I’m doing better already. That wasn’t so hard, after all.
  • exercise more — I’ll walk  on pretty days when I can get outside. (something I love to do, so it’s easy to keep that one too)  On days when I can’t get outside, I’ve got it covered. I’ve worked out a routine to walk up and down the steps where I work. I can do that and it gets me away from the computer for a few minutes. My plan is working already.
  • two is probably enough right now — any more than that and I can’t handle it.

Actually, when you think about it resolutions are just basically good intentions. They only work if you’re really serious about whatever it is you want to change or start doing. Here are my serious, “I’m determined to do it” goals — be kinder to people (not be judgmental), give more, live out God’s Word every day, and get really serious about my writing projects (as in, get down to it and finish books that are languishing in my computer).

Are you making any resolutions or setting goals for the new year? Say this with me, “I can do it.” — just ask God to help you do whatever it is you’re trying to resolve to do or not do. He’s already promised that He will. That’s all you need.

So, here’s to great things in the coming weeks and months. Happy 2018, y’all!

Christmas Memories

My best Christmas memories include big bloomers and boxes of peppermint sticks.

I don’t know if my cousins and other family members have the same memories of Christmas Eve at Papaw’s that I do. They may be like, “what? I don’t remember any of that.” It was always a fun time and somebody always got a gag gift —  of big red bloomers. It was a jolly get together, that’s for sure. The living room wasn’t too big, but all of us managed to fit in and everybody had fun.

Christmas eve after we got home, I always had to hurry up and go to bed so Santa could come and leave my new doll or bicycle. Yes, I believed in “Santy” Claus. Everything on my list was under the tree when I got up on Christmas morning. I don’t remember when I found out he wasn’t really the one who brought my presents, but apparently I made the transition unscathed.

Presents aren’t nearly as important to me now. Does that mean I’m getting old? (yikes)  I don’t think you have to wait till you’re older to realize what the most important things are. Some of us are just slow.  I like receiving gifts, but my favorite things are hanging out with family and friends, making memories eating and laughing. Have I ever mentioned that I like to eat?

Christmas memories has to include our celebrations at church. That was central for us — we were always at church, especially during this time of year. The real Christmas story isn’t about Santa Claus or flying reindeer. It’s about a gift — the greatest gift ever given to us. Jesus truly is the Reason for the Season.

Those are just a few of my memories of Christmas past. It’s fun to look back and laugh. What are some of your favorites?

I’m really looking forward to 2018 and to making more great memories in the new year! Let’s gather back here again in a year and see what fun we can reminisce about.

 

 

 

 

 

This is Christmas

Let’s just say I understand why parents go overboard at Christmas and buy their kids everything in sight. The motorcycle group we’re in went shopping this weekend to help provide Christmas for some kids in our community and we had fun.

Do you know how many cute things they have for girls? The doublewide husband and I picked out presents on a list one little girl had written for Santa. We ran through everything and soon had our buggy full — I just had to get one more pair of leggings and then found a pair of cute jeans with designs on the back pockets. Little girls gotta have some bling! Oh and the pajamas with fluffy cats and dogs on them…

The rest of the group shopping with us had lists from the other children. Yep, we just about bought the place out and then headed out with bags full of loot. This is one of the things I love about our small community. The church group we joined with to do this had chili, vegetable soup, corn bread and all the extras waiting for us back at the church house. We ate till we were ready to pop.

It was an action packed few days that included a local church’s drive-thru nativity. After looking at the scenes, we went inside the fellowship hall for (you guessed it) soup, sandwiches and snacks of all kinds. The moral to this story is — find a church in the South to attend — they love celebrations and they feed you. Church lady food is some of the best around.

To round out the weekend, I also worked in a neat experience with a Journey through Bethlehem at another church in the area. My friend Shaylah and I experienced life in a Bethlehem village, had some warm apple cider and picked out beads to make bracelets. We strolled through different tent stations that reflected an aspect of life in Bible times and included  a manger scene with Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus. They were guarded by animals like those that might have been in the stable that night so many years ago. In the last station, a lady in Biblical dress shared the salvation story and told us some interesting facts about the donkey standing at her side. Did you know donkeys have a marking in the shape of the cross on their backs?

If you ever have the chance to help buy gifts for somebody or see a live nativity put on by your local church, don’t miss out on it. It might be a little chilly outside, but the experience is well worth it.

I’ll treasure the memories of all my little trips around town this weekend. I think my Christmas has officially been made.